Symbolized by a Champagne cork on the verge of an emotional breakdown, Libra writers are ruled by Venus, or as Ancient Romans knew her, Justitia: the deity of internal monologues, left on reads, and will-they?/won’t they? cliffhangers. These writers are prone to kidney pains more than others, most likely stemming from their insistence on hydrating with a thermos of cran-cosmos.

 These signs are the true royalty of the Zodiac, holding a monopoly on rags-to-riches stories. but Libras don’t just want riches: they want the prestige that comes with throwing the most decadent party you’ve ever seen.

This regal ambition is on full display in F. Scott Fitzgerald’s (September 24, 1896) The Great Gatsby, as Jay Gatsby sheds his working-class past and adopts the lifestyle of a New York tycoon, throwing extravagant parties in order to attract flapper girl Daisy Buchanan. Or Truman Capote’s (September 30, 1934) Breakfast at Tiffany’s where Holly Golightly transforms herself from Texas-huckleberry to New York City it-girl. And even in Mario Puzo’s (October 15, 1920) The Godfather, where mafia don Vito Corleone assumes control of Las Vegas.

 But with every party comes the inevitable hangover. When not party-planning, these writers are forced to confront time, youth and beauty. In Anne Rice’s (October 4, 1946) Interview With The Vampire, aristocrat Lestat wants his forever-partner but ends up with eternally sulking Louie and adolescent Claudia. Even Oscar Wilde’s (October 16, 1854) The Picture of Dorian Gray, where titular Dorian remains forever young while his portrait absorbs all his decadent sins.

 As one of four Cardinal signs, Libra writers are trendsetters, brimming with original ideas. Unfortunately, these air signs are also wracked by indecision. Innately judicial, these writers are cursed to see both sides of an argument. Perhaps this is why William Faulkner’s (September 25, 1897) As I Lay Dying examines the Bundren family through multiple perspectives and stream-of-consciousness prose, creating a kind of Rashomon effect of conflicting accounts. Or, in Ursula K. LeGuin’s (October 21, 1929) short story “Those Who Walk Away From Omelas” which centers on the moral paradox of a utopian society where everyone’s happiness depends on one child’s perpetual suffering. And again, in Elie Wiesel’s (September 30, 1928) Dawn, where rebel freedom fighter Elisha wrestles with politics and morality as he’s tasked with executing a captured enemy soldier.

 Above all these writers seek balance in all areas of life. This is embodied in Terry McMillan’s (October 18, 1951) How Stella Got Her Groove Back, as titular Stella struggles to find a balance between motherhood, her career, and her love life. And in Frank Herbert’s (October 8, 1920) Dune, where prince Paul Atreides plots control of planet Arrakis and its spice trade, in an effort to restore order to the planet and the universe at large.

 Associated with the Seventh House of the Zodiac, Libra writers are most concerned with relationships, partnerships, and marriages, but also spiritual marriages: they want a party worth dying for. In Tim O’Brien’s (October 1, 1946) The Things They Carried memorializes the unbreakable bonds of brothers in war, while Irvine Welsh’s (September 27, 1958) Trainspotting sees junkie Renton sacrifice friends and family for cheap thrills.

 Libra writers have all the potential to achieve immortality on the page, if only they would drink some water, stop second-guessing themselves, break away from party-planning, and get to work on their novel about that midwestern hayseed that transforms into a universe-saving aristocrat.

 Notable Mentions

Miguel de Cervantes, September 29, 1547
Arthur Rimbaud, October 20, 1854
Damon Runyon, October 4, 1880
T.S. Eliot, September 28, 1888
E.E. Cummings, October 14, 1894
Graham Greene, October 2, 1904
Arthur Miller, October 18, 1917
Gore Vidal, October 3, 1925
Jeanne Wakatsuki Houston, September 26, 1934
Jackie Collins, October 4, 1937
Roy Blount Jr, October 4, 1941
R.L. Stine, October 8, 1943
Frederick Barthelme, October 10, 1943
Robert Jordan, October 17, 1948
Ntozake Shange, October 18, 1948
bell hooks, September 25, 1952
Michael Lewis, October 15, 1960
Dan Savage, October 7, 1964
Sherman Alexie, October 7, 1966

- Forest Oliver